The Query Letter That Helped Me Land an Agent
Writing a book is hard, but do you know what’s even harder?
Writing a query letter.
How do you capture the essence of an 85,000-word story in one single page? It’s impossible! But, with the help of fellow writers, a query letter workshop, and lots of research, I was eventually able to draft a letter that I felt good about.
Of course it wasn’t perfect (neither is my book), but it did its job, ultimately landing me more than 20 agent requests. What surprised me the most is how much of my query letter my agent used for the letters she sent out to publishers and how much of that letter the publisher used for the jacket copy of Dear Dotty. I share this because you can learn a ton about how to write a standout query letter from studying the backs of your favorite novels. They actually serve a very similar purpose: to convince the reader to buy the book!
Okay, without further ado, here’s the query letter that helped me to get an agent:
Dear Rachel,
What’s Rosie to do when she catches her best friend in cahoots with her arch nemesis, causes a scene at her sister’s baby shower, and accidentally kisses the Wrong Guy?
Turn to her dead aunt for advice, of course.
In Dear Dotty, Rosie struggles to fit in with her over-accomplished family, type-A roommate, and workaholic boss. But she keeps trying, despite nearly losing herself as she strives to become someone else’s idea of perfect. When Rosie is abruptly fired from her job at a tree-themed tech start-up (in part because she regularly steals all the good snacks from the community pantry), the illusion that she has life figured out is shattered. Knowing she needs a push, her great aunt Dotty—a globetrotting, martini-swilling nudist, and the only person Rosie has ever truly felt herself around—challenges her to pursue a long-buried dream, savings account be damned.
But then Dotty dies. And Rosie spirals.
As never-before-heard details of Dotty’s past emerge through a series of revelatory emails, Rosie realizes that maybe Dotty’s life wasn’t as charmed as she once thought. Desperate to forge her own path, Rosie rejects Dotty’s ready-made plan for happiness. She decides to play it safe – again – only to learn that even conventional choices have consequences. With her career, friendships, and family unraveling, Rosie must set aside her grief and look to Dotty for guidance one last time.
At 83,000 words, Dear Dotty is Maybe in Another Life meets Confessions of a Shopaholic meets The Star-Crossed Sisters of Tuscany (in terms of content and audience – I know these authors have very wide readerships!). This story will appeal to readers who love millennial/women’s fiction that features quasi-functional families, strong female friendships, and a determined yet sometimes misguided narrator with a plucky sense of humor. I know you’re looking for manuscripts that explore the struggles of twenty-something life, so I hope Rosie’s woes hit the mark for you!
I recently completed the Stanford Continuing Studies novel writing program, am an active member of the Women’s Fiction Writers Association and the NorCal Writers’ Retreat community, and regularly participate in writing groups and workshops. My short story, A Runaway Tale was selected for the Character Award by Story Shares in 2018. I also write about career topics for The Muse and have been featured on FastCompany, Forbes, and Business Insider. I’m the proud dog mom of a mutt named Indy, who graciously agreed to serve as the inspiration for Dotty’s dog, Bug.
Thank you for your consideration. The full manuscript is available upon request. I look forward to hearing from you!
Warmly,
Jaclyn Westlake
Why I think it worked:
It’s voicey. The opening line nicely highlights the stakes and showcases Rosie’s personality
It tells the reader what to expect from the story without giving everything away (set-up, inciting incident, and complications)
It provides all the relevant information, including the word count, genre, and comp titles
It’s personalized. I specifically reference language from Rachel’s Manuscript Wishlist
It tells the reader a little about me without going over the top
It specifically states that the full, completed manuscript is available upon request
If you’re interested in getting some help with your query letter, stick around! I’m planning to launch a query letter critique service soon. Sign up for my newsletter to ensure that you’ll be the first to know about it.
In the meantime, good luck out there!
